Hello beloved readers!
No I haven't forgotten about you folxs! I was absent for a little while due to losing my password to the account associated with this blog. I just got everything recently figured out and bam! I'm back in business baby! Oh yeah! How I have missed writing for you all.
Let me tell you something - there is just something about writing that is very therapeutic for me no matter what the reason. I think it has to stem from my involvement with the 12-step program I'm apart of. We believe in putting pen to paper, or in this case, fingers to the keyboard. LOL! Anyways I'm happy to be back in writing commission. Gosh does it feel good to just type away at my laptop.
I'm sitting here after not being able to sleep, jamming to P!nk and drinking a Coca-Cola. Yea I know caffeine is something that keeps you up, but that isn't why I haven't been able to sleep. I think it's because today is a special day for me. If you haven't figured it out by the title - I turned another year older today (34 years young!) and this is my second birthday as my true self. My birthday last year was a bust pretty much. I spent the day by myself except when I went to church.
This year I'm going to church. But afterwards my pastor and her daughter and I are all going out to lunch to celebrate. Later on - my sponsor and I are going to eat dinner and then hit a meeting. I am actually so excited I think that sleeping has decided to evade me. I mean I feel like a kid waiting for Santa Claus to arrive. Ya all remember that feeling trying to sleep on Christmas Eve waiting for Santa (really our parents or loved ones) to come? Yah that's me this year.
I don't expect any gifts this year because in reality - who needs more material possession in this life? Our society is so focused and driven by capitalism that it's disgusting to me. It is why for the last two years I've donated my birthday to different groups on Facebook via their fundraising option. Last year was enfleshed and this year it is United Methodist Forward.
As I turned another year older - I don't want for much anymore in the way of things. I've learned over this last year (with its set-backs, turmoil, heartaches, blessings, losses, gains) that the most important thing any of us can ask for is one very simple thing - TIME! Time spent with family! Time spent with loved ones! Time spent with beloveds! Time spent with friends! Time is such a precious commodity that it has become in our capitalistic society the most valuable thing! Think about it - when was the last time you were able to pencil in that coffee date with your BFF or when was the last time you spent Sunday gathered around the family table for that big dinner your mom or grandma made? Chances are that it has been a while since those type of events have occurred for a great majority of us.
I'm sure grateful for the ability to be celebrating another year of life on this messy, beautiful planet we call earth. I should've been dead quit a few times over, suicide attempts and a drug overdose. This year has brought some valuable lessons that I'm eternally grateful for no matter how those lessons came either. One of the biggest lessons is that people are more important than anything in this world. Relationships need to mean more than things... not the other way around.
I guess that is why I'm so excited for this birthday. Even though I'm not an extrovert by any means - I am so excited that people want to actually celebrate my birthday by CHOSING to be around me this year. Its like being a kid in a candy store and being told you can get whatever you want - no limits whatsoever. I'm not talking about just anyone either. After some heavy duty pain - I realize who I want to be in my life and I've become very selective about who I give my time to. People who are surrounding me this birthday are people who have become very important people in my life and I've grown to love them deeply and I don't just consider them friends - I consider them family.
I have a chosen family today that has become my family! I am absolutely one blessed person to have my family chose me.
Much Love to You All -
Brian Lee
